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Jokes Archives



Joke: How many perverts does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Question. How many perverts does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Answer. Just one, but it takes a surgical team to get it out.

Joke: An American picks up a hot blonde tourist and...

An American picks up a hot blonde tourist and takes her back to his place. After a round of passionate sex, he asks, “So, you finish?” She pauses for a second and frowns, “No.” Surprised, he grabs her, and they go at it again until she’s screaming with passion.

Afterward he smiles and asks, “You finish?” Once more she smiles, cuddles him, and softly says, “No.” Stunned, but damned if he’s going to leave her unsatisfied, he mounts her a third time until she’s clawing the sheets.

Exhausted, he asks again, “You finish?” Finally, the blonde whispers, “No, I’m Norwegian.”

Joke: Guy having sex with his girlfriend and her twin

My friend told me he had sex with his girlfriend and her twin. I asked him how he could tell them apart.

He said her brother had a moustache.

Joke: Giving blowjob to cure sore throat

“When I have a sore throat, I always give my husband a blow job.” Sue tells her friend Carol. “The day after, it’s all better. You should try it.”

A day later Sue asked Carol is she followed her advice.

“I sure did!” grinned Carol. “And your husband couldn’t believe it was your idea!”

Joke: Large dildo hits windshield

The Smith family is driving behind a trash truck when a large dildo flies out and hits their windshield.

To hide her embarrassment, the mother turns and says to her young kids, "My, what a big insect!"

Her seven year old son responds, "Yeah, I’m surprised it could even fly with a dick that big!"

Joke: A naked lady goes to Bantas bar

A naked lady goes to Banta's bar, asks for a peg. Banta stares at her. Lady said, "Never seen a nude woman?"

Banta replied, "Nahi main soch raha hoon, tu paise kaha se nikalegi."

Joke: Kissing is like real estate

Kissing is like real estate.

The most important thing is:

location,
location,
and location!

Joke: What is a Zebra?

Question. What is a Zebra?

Answer. 25 sizes larger than an A bra.

Joke: Mirror Mishap

“My boyfriend complains I hog the mirror,” one blonde says to another.

“I know what you mean,” her friend says. “Mine broke his back ‘cause I was hogging the mirror.”

“He had an accident in the bathroom?”

“No, on the freeway.”

Joke: Man applies for Gynecologists assistants job

A Man Goes into the Job Center in downtown Denver and sees an ad for a gynecologist’s assistant. Interested, he asks the clerk for details.

The clerk says, “The job entails getting the ladies ready for the gynecologist. You have to help the women out of their underwear, lay them down, and rub soothing oils into their private parts so they’re ready for their examination. The annual salary is $65,000, and you'll have to go to Billings, Montana.”

"Good grief,” exclaims the man. "Is that where the job is?"

"No sir,” syas the clerk. “That's where the end of the line is right now.”




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