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Joke: Guy goes in for confession after sex the night before

Two teenage boys turned up at church and the first went in for confession. He told the priest he'd had sex the night before.

"Who was the girl involved?" asked the priest.

"I don't know, it was dark," replied the boy.

"Was it Bernadette McLafferty?"

The boy said he still didn't know.

"Was it Theresa O'Hare.........or Rosemary McGinty?" asked the priest.

"I don't know, it was too dark," insisted the boy.

"Could it have been Anne-Marie, the baker's daughter?" asked the priest.

The boy continued to deny any knowledge of the girl's identity.

Finally, the exasperated priest sent the boy away and told him to return when he could reveal the girl's name.

Outside his friend was waiting anxiously.

"Did you get to know the girl" he asked.

"Naw," said his pal, "but I got four good leads for this Saturday night!"

Joke: Pretty young sex education teacher...

The pretty young sex education teacher handed out the final test papers.

Tom got a D, Dick got a D-, Harry got an F.

The three got together after class to complain about their low grades.

"That bitch!" said Tom "I can't believe she gave me a D"

"We should get even with her" said Dick "Let's grab her after school"

"Yeah" said Harry "...and kick her in the balls!"

Joke: High school girl had opportunity to go to a party all alone...

A high school girl finally had the opportunity to go to a party all alone.

Since she was very good looking, she was a bit nervous about what to do if boys hit on her. Her Mom said,

"It is very easy! Whenever a boy starts hitting on you, you ask him 'What will be the name of our baby?', that will scare them off." So off she went.

After a little while at the party a boy started dancing with her and, little by little, kissing her and touching her. She asked him, "What will our baby be called?"

The boy found some excuse and disappeared. Some time later the same thing happened again, a boy started to kiss her neck, her shoulders... she stopped him and asked him 'What will be the name of our baby?',

He ran off.

Later on, another boy invited her for a walk. After a few minutes he started kissing her and she asked him, "What will our baby be called?"

He continued, now slowly taking her clothes off. "What will our baby be called?" she asked once more.

He began to have sex with her. "What will our baby be called?!" she asked again.

After he was done, he peeled off his condom, tied it in a knot and said,

"...if he gets out of this one... Failed Rubber!"

Joke: People parking behind the church at night...

The preacher got up in church one Sunday morning and told the congregation, "Brothers and sisters, we are going to have to do something about people parking behind the church at night. I was out there this morning and there are enough beer cans out there to build a car."

One of the old sisters stood up and said, "Amen brother and enough rubbers to put tires on it."

Joke: A finger goes in me...

A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man always has me first.

Wedding Ring

Joke: I go in hard I come out soft You blow me hard

I go in hard. I come out soft. You blow me hard.

Chewing gum

Joke: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?

What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?

Bubblegum

Joke: Whats starts with a C and ends with a T?

Whats starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?

Coconut

Joke: Whats in front of a woman and back of a cow?

Whats in front of a woman and back of a cow?

The letter W

Joke: Two daughters given parts in a Christmas pageant...

Two daughters had been given parts in a Christmas pageant at their Church. At dinner that night, they got into an argument as to who had the most important role.

Finally the 10 year old said to her younger sister, "Well you just ask Mom. She'll tell you it's much harder to be a virgin than it is to be an angel."




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