Previously: Joke: How To Get Rid Of Blind Dates - II
Order a baked potato. When the waiter brings your food, hide the potato, wait a few minutes, and ask the waiter for the potato you "never got". When the waiter returns with another potato, have the first one back on your plate.
Order beef tongue. Make lewd comparisons or comments about it.
Get your date drunk. Talk about their philosophy and tape the conversation. Later use good judgment in editing to twist their words around.
Discuss boils and lesions, as if from personal experience.
Occasionally speak in Pig Latin throughout the meal.
Take a break, and go into the restroom. When you return to the table, throw a spare pair of underwear on the back of one of the chairs. Tell your date, "They need to air out."
Order for your date. Order more food then he/she can possible eat. Tell them they "must eat it all or suffer the consequences."
If they are paying, order the most expensive thing on the menu. Take one bite, pretend like the food is disgusting and say, "Man, did you get ripped off!"
Bring twenty candles with you to the restaurant. During the meal get up and arrange them around the table in a circle. Chant.
Save the bones from your meal, and explain that you're taking them home to your invalid, senile old mother, because it's a lot cheaper than actually feeding her.
Ask your date how much money they have with them.
Refuse to speak to your date. Request that they mime the conversation instead.
