Editor: This sex query should easily make it to the Ripleys Believe it or not. Married for two and a half years and still a virgin. Very hard to believe. Please post your thoughts on this in the comments. And also, some sensible solutions to the problem to help the couple.
Q. I am 24-years-old and have been married for two-and-a-half years but I am still a virgin. The problem is that my husband and I have been unsuccessful in performing intercourse. Please help.
A. Your husband and you, both should consult a sex specialist to diagnosis this problem of unsuccessful intercourse. The solution, if any, can only follow after the problem is figured out.
Comments (29)
on: November 13, 2007 3:40 PM | Reply
this type of problems are quite common now a days.we too had similar problem and have to wait nearly three months to connsumate our marriage with the help of a minor surgery by a gynaec.wish you all the best
on: November 13, 2007 5:50 PM | Reply
You need to check the following home checklist before going to an expensive sex consultant.
1. Do your husband have a penis?.
If the answer is yes. then check if the penis has the ability to get hard? If the answer is No. Go to sex consultant.
2. Do you have a vagina?
If the answer is yes. try lubricating it and then inserting the penis. If the answer is NO. don't go to the sex consultant. Go to plastic surgeon to make one.
If you cant do this. then the best solution is that you and your husband keep visiting www.debonairblog.com. You might
get some ideas if you concentrate on the site.
thank you:)
on: November 13, 2007 6:01 PM | Reply
This kind of situation is clinically seen but rarely. due to lack of knowledge and some times due to tight hymen or vaginal spasm penetration is difficult. you need to meet a gynaecologist and he will certainly help you out
on: November 13, 2007 7:16 PM | Reply
Dear Editor, many people has this kinds of problem that their penis doesn't go inside because its not strong enough to stand the obstruction of the vagina. Anyway there is a very easy solution, suck him well and make it real strong and don't wait at all when it is strong. Try to get it inside as soon as possible. Once it is inside, it will not turn soft unless it had its orgasm.
on: November 13, 2007 7:39 PM | Reply
Reasons I think of not having sex
1. He is having sex with someone and is in love with her
2. He knows that the wife has some STD or some other disease which the wife does not know... For eg.. bone marrow infection.
3. The husband is GAY
4. I remember reading a previous query that the husband masturbates but does not has sex.. that can also be 1 reason
PS :: The lady should explain more on what does she mean by the word " Unsuccessful "
on: November 14, 2007 12:46 AM | Reply
does she knows whats the meaning of Virgin? hope that she didnt confuse between havent conceive and virgin.
on: November 14, 2007 12:52 AM | Reply
I belive in confidence have confidence and do intercourse.dont have any negative feelings.i am sure u will have positive result.Wish u all the best.
on: November 14, 2007 1:05 AM | Reply
I dont believe it really...i'm sure it wont be the case actually. it the lady have posted at debonair blog, it means she's very well into blogs,pornos,adults and sex and all this stuff. She must be educated and (intelligent) to end up at right place for her problem, which today isn't REALLY any problem for a school kid as well.....i personally think she had nothing else to post/share, so she could only create this problem stuff....
on: November 14, 2007 1:08 AM | Reply
somebody gift them a good triple x porn movie [ for straight people /couple ] !! that should do :-)
on: November 14, 2007 2:58 AM | Reply
First of all i wanna say.....that wife is too hot for her husband.....and for husband......Dude take out the sex thing out of ur mind.....just clean up ur mind......Sex is not a game of dick and pussy.....sex is a frame of mind......Dude...i guess u hav a very hot wife....u should encash her beauty....just dont take sex thing on ur mind....i must say u r the only person who has solution for ur problem......or just need a counsellor
on: November 14, 2007 4:36 AM | Reply
You may wish to consider some combination of the following:
1. Use some lubricant. Sometimes moisture issues prevent easy penetration, and if the man has trouble maintaining an erection in the first place this can hurt the encounter.
2. Use a cockring. This can help a man with potency issues maintain an erection and get coitus under way.
3. Relax. Nothing kills male potency like pressure to perform.
on: November 14, 2007 8:11 AM | Reply
On reading query I remembered a joke I heard a long time ago.
It goes like this,
A young couple goes to a doctor, in his consulting chamber, the guy confides to the doctor, that they are a newly married couple and have not been able to have an intercourse as they do not know how to do it. The doctor, a wise guy asks the guy, does he mind if he (the doctor) shows how it is done? The guy says no, and the doctor happily undresses the girl and pounds her showing the guy how it has to be done. Then the guy also follows the docs example and pounds the girl. After a royal pounding the guy thanks the doctor who does not charge him anything.
A week later, the doctor while sitting with his friends at a pub sees the same guy at a different table sitting with his friends. The doctor points the guy to his friends and says, do you see that man over there? What a fool he is, he brought his wife to my chamber and allowed me to have a royal fuck with her. In the meantime, the guy points to the doctor and tells his friends, do you see that doctor over there?
Last week, I hired a prostitute and had nowhere to take her, so I took her to his chamber and screwed her!
on: November 14, 2007 8:47 AM | Reply
Man.. they have a serious problem with them...they need to c doctor immediately....
2 and half years....wow....what a waste of time...
on: November 14, 2007 9:12 AM | Reply
I am also facing same problem from last week since my marriage. I am unable to insert my penis in my wife's vagina as it is very tight. When I try to insert it in, she starts crying as it is very painful. Please suggest for me as I am a first timer in having sex.
on: November 14, 2007 1:02 PM | Reply
I'd like to help both of them by giving them a practical training!
on: November 14, 2007 3:30 PM | Reply
Before Sex take bath and light massage with hot water then use some good quality vaselin on yourself and on your hubby tool then try i hope everything will be fine
on: November 14, 2007 4:45 PM | Reply
I have come across such instance where the couple has faced such problem,there are many reasons, some are;
1) If you have tried for intercourse but not been successful could be because dryness in the vegina, due to which there is acute pain and the vagina does not respond to the partners act. This is mainly because the partner is not well aroused. When the partner is arroused the vegina will open up and gets well lubricated, so as to have a good sex.
on: November 14, 2007 5:05 PM | Reply
I understand ur problem. u just observe him at his fellings about sex. how in the sense wear sexy dresses in front of him. mostly at nights.and Iwant to know wether u wear saries or dresses at home.
if u wear saries at home. make sure that ur blouse should be short at front side showing urs to be sexy while ur husband see at u. buy sex books and leave that in bed room. the picture in that book must be sexy. and I need to give u suggestion that let u make him wake up at early mornings bykeeping alarm so he will defnitely get disturb at the time and he wont get sleep. at that time u have to show ur talent on him by showing ur sexy parts in ur body then definitely u will be satisfied with ur husband. I hope u will do the bes. if u have any douts mail me .
on: November 15, 2007 12:18 AM | Reply
Hi! I think you are doing a great job providing much needed information which is scientific and pleasurable.
I personally am very grateful.
Though, I have a request. Please keep this "sex advice" section up front. I mean, the process to submit a question should be simpler and more accessible.
Anyway, I had a question. Is providing oral stimulation to your partner's anus harmful? If yes, what are the risks?
Thanks again!
:)
on: November 16, 2007 3:44 AM | Reply
Aur thoda andar dal de!!!!!!
on: November 17, 2007 10:38 PM | Reply
Cant believe a guy cant fuck. While sleeping accidentally rub his doodle if he doesnt get an erection, give me a buzz.
on: November 20, 2007 4:23 PM | Reply
Well, I would like to say only one thing. Whatever that girl is saying, it is possible. i know a particular case about a very close friend,wherein everything was perfect i.e the boy was getting a perfect erection which was about 6.5 to 7 inches and properly stiff also, but penetration was not possible because 1) the girl was not getting properly wet 2) the hymen had broken but the ring was small in orifice & also very hard for which the girl used to get unbearable pain when the boy used to try to penetrate her for which she used to stiffen her body & not allow the boy to enter further. However the couple loved each other very much for which they didnt want to destroy their marriage. But out of ignorance & shame they did not consult any doctor for almost 5 Years.(imageine 5 Years without sex having been married. Think twice as to whom your will enter in the Ripleys Believe It or Not) Luckily since I was very close to my friend once when I removed the topic of them not having a child, he told me what the problem was. Then I suggested them to go to a lady Gynaecologist who was my very good friend. After examining the girl she gave the following treatment. 1) By having a small opeartion sort of the hymen ring was scraped & cleared so that it would allow the penis to enter 2) They were advised to use K.Y.jelly during intercourse which gave them lot of lubrication & smooth intercourse. Now the couple are happy & having regular sex with 1 kid of almost 3 Years Old & the latest news is they are expecting their second kid within another few months time.
I feel the biggest problem in India is the people are hesitant to talk out their problems let aside to their friends & relatives but even in certain case to their doctors because sex is considered to be a taboo & never to be spoken openly. Also I feel people make fun of their problem instead of trying to help them come out of it. I feel this should change since medical science has advanced so much that in recent days almost everything is possible, the only thing is you have to talk out boldly else you will end up screwing up your life. I would advise the girl to visit a good gynacologist (beware of the sexologist since there are lot many quacks everywhere), talk to them clearly about their problem & get it resolved soon since they are loosing precious time & missing the best part of married life. Anyway all the best for the couple.
on: December 13, 2007 5:43 PM | Reply
Who said, such problems dont exist!! I have got married a year ago...and I still haven't penetrated! We have oral sex, and by the time, i bring my penis, she says,.,,its painfull and last she puts blame on me...saying...i dont know to make sex! Then oneday i tried with a callgirl, i was good enough and everything went on fine....im really fond of having a child, but things aren't in right place! My wife doesn't come to doctor also, she says...i dont know to make it! what to do? Maybe someguys reading would make some funny comment, but it hurts when i think of this problem....
on: December 25, 2007 6:52 PM | Reply
hi,
It is usual problem in india people are hesitant to talk about sex, with husband itself.
Start taking about sex and new positon, watch sex movies.Ware dress which expose ur boot cleavage like pop-up bra available in the market,belly so on.
on: January 29, 2008 6:39 PM | Reply
Dr Divya your post is worth reading but i want to know how many indian females want to suck?
on: May 15, 2008 6:08 PM | Reply
common dr u think they r serious bout it...i don think so as its impossible to be virgin after 2nhalf yr of marriage.....might be his husband is insertin somethin else inside her vagina haha
on: November 17, 2008 4:02 AM | Reply
No need to worry. Motivate your wife through some other lady of your family who is closer to her so that she is convinced to go to a lady gynaecologist. I am sure, she would suggest to your wife to apply some Petrolium Jelly around her vegina defore making an attempt to make an entry. This trick will positivey be effective and THE LOVE WOULD BE MADE! Try and tell.
on: December 19, 2008 3:25 PM | Reply
After going through the topics which are being discussed openly and even useful tips and consultation being provided. Well the problem which I am undergoing since last 6 months of my marriage is that till date I haven't had intercourse with my wife as she experiences unbearable pain the moment I try to insert my erected penis inside her vagina as her vagina is so small that even after I try forcibly to push my penis inside but than also i am unable to break the barrier. So I request you to kindly help me out of this problem which is ruining our family life.
on: January 8, 2009 2:45 PM | Reply
I liked the suggestion one guy Ajay has given. indeed people hesitate to talk in our society, but this problem prevails, its one thing if both partners acknowledge the problem and agree to do something about it, but what if one of them is stubborn and just wont see a doctor and even if he does he doesnt alow physical examination out of fear.
we have ben married for 3 years now, i was about 27 1/2 when i got married, we have a problem, my husband cant sustain his erection and each time we tell each other that the next time will be good, and sleep over it. but now its getting unbearable for me, not only is this problem there, i have started disliking him as a person itself. its not because of the sex but for the fact that he isnt ready to acknowledge that there is a problem and wont consult a doc.
sometimes when he does ejaculte inside by him climaxing, i feel it pains for him, he doesnt wait for me to climax, never has, and i dont understand y it pains.. is our problem too complex or its too simple .. somebody could put some light please..